A Nebraskan Jaunt

(Photo Credit: Google Images - Andy Lim)

As beautiful and ceremonious as they are - many people hate weddings. Probably because it reminds them of their own misery, whether it be loneliness or some kind of hatred towards the opposite sex and the idea of "forever". I, on the other hand, like weddings. I will agree that the cost of a wedding is outrageous and unnecessary and there is definitely too much emphasis on the whole "show" of it all but I like it all the same. I can't help but look at wedding themes and dresses and rings and venues and food and decoration... it's attractive. Especially to a woman in her 20s and during wedding season. Most female friends of mine also spend some of their time surfing the web browsing through wedding websites and photos. The market is definitely geared towards women - to suck us into believing we need the whole she-bang to be happy and have the perfect day. And as much as I've admitted to being a victim of all the advertising... my own wedding will probably not resemble anything like the fairytale TLC broadcasts or the picturesque image theknot.com has created. Hopefully, someday, my own wedding will reflect what I witnessed this past weekend - a couple truly dedicated to one another, binding themselves as one under the authority of God in love and devotion.

The ceremony was beautiful. Amanda glowed as she floated down the isle and the pure joy on Scott's face will forever be ingrained in my memory. Young couple, young romance, but a romance that will stand the tests of time, I am certain of it. There was no question of doubt or uncertainty in their minds, it was obvious they knew they were meant to be. The pastor's speech was not for the congregation but rather for the bride and groom. It was personal, it was heartfelt, and it was honest. The words he spoke were true. He discussed the highs and lows of a marriage, the reality that not always things will be perfect, and he drove home the importance of love and co-operation. The submission of a wife to her husband and in turn, the submission of the husband to his wife. No one likes the words submission and I am one of them. The idea of submitting to someone else irks me and immediately I am uncomfortable. I blame the era for this - the individualistic mentality of society and the greed which surrounds it. Despite this discomfort, it's true. When marrying someone you are putting someone else first. You are committing to being one person - a whole - and that takes submission. It was beautifully said. The pastor's words to Scott were, "This is a serious calling - The Bible is calling you to love your wife the way Jesus loves his church...which means to lay down your life for her's as Jesus died for his people". That statement hit hard. The truth of it was moving as I sat there and realized that Scott would willingly die for Amanda in a heartbeat. The tears were swelling in my eyes and I noticed Brittany sniffling away beside me. It was beautiful.

My short trip to Nebraska was engulfed by the wedding - we didn't really do much except browse the mall and hang out with Amanda, but that is exactly what I wanted it to be. I wanted it to be a trip dedicated to a friend who was making the ultimate sacrifice - marriage. She gave herself up as an individual to be united with Scott forever. That is one of the most admirable acts one can witness and I don't think many people realize the importance of such an act. I know I didn't until this weekend.



As an aside, my baby died a year ago today. I thought long and hard about whether I would write a post dedicated to him or not and I decided not. Just a small tribute at the end of an uplifting message to let him know I haven't forgotten. I miss you everyday, Ginger, you were my little furry life companion. xox

Hobbit Potential

(Photo Credit: Me of me!)

"As for the Hobbits of the Shire.......they dressed in bright colours, being notably fond of yellow and green; but they seldom wore shoes, since their feet had tough leathery soles and were clad in a thick curling hair, much like the hair of their heads, which was commonly brown. Thus, the only craft little practised among them was shoe-making; but they had long and skilful fingers and could make many other useful and comely things. 

Their faces were as a rule good-natured rather than beautiful, broad, bright-eyed, red-cheeked, with mouths apt to laughter, and to eating and drinking. And laugh they did, and eat, and drink, often and heartily, being fond of simple jests at all times, and of six meals a day (when they could get them). They were hospitable and delighted in parties, and in presents, which they gave away freely and eagerly accepted."

Tolkien's words describe them best but I must say that my face - the picture above - is the perfect visual to match. I am not willing to photograph my feet and/or from the neck down to prove how short/plump I am on the world wide inter-web. I can save myself at least some dignity, can't I? But I have the dark curly hair, the "good-natured" look, my bright eyes (they aren't so bright in this image, my iPhone is limited, okay?!), my "broad" cheeks, my mouth apt to laughter and especially eating and drinking. Also, my cheeks turn a brilliant red when I ingest alcohol, which Hobbits tend to do quite often. There, the perfect fit! I am also a fan of bright coloured clothing. 

As a kid I used to ride around on my bike pretending it was a horse and that I was the brave Samwise Gamgee galloping around Middle Earth. Unfortunately for me, and my equally nerdy friends, there were no female hobbit heroes. Immediately identifying with the Hobbits wasn't hard, though, despite our gender differences. They were the main characters, of course, and every child wants to be the hero. I picked Sam and not Frodo because in my little girl heart I felt he was the real star - the friend who rescued Frodo from himself and helped carry him up the mountain to the fires of Mordor to destroy the great ring. He was also pure of heart, loyal, naive and honest. To me, he embodied the perfect friend. And unlike most little girls, I didn't identify to the gender stereotyping, as my favourite toys consisted of a plastic airport, tonka trunks and violent video games. So I suppose it was appropriate that my identity lay in the male character who adventured across a mythical land to save the world. Not much has changed in the way of my imagination. Except, you know, I've accepted I'm female. :) 

A casting call for extras on the Hobbit. My dream? Yes. Unattainable? Of course. But this whole post was inspired by someone within reach of that dream that I happen to know. He will be an elf if he gets it, which would be equally cool although my physical requirements would not match, at all, and neither would my demeanour really. Elves are graceful, beautiful, gentle, and soft.... I am none of those. One of my boyfriend's loving nicknames for me is a bull. When I completed the sentence with "Bull in a China shop?", he said, "No, just a bull in general". And he is correct. So my elf dreams are better laid to rest. I suppose I could be Eowyn, her rough, badass behaviour isn't too far fetched from my own. And in days where women had no rights and were lesser than men, I wouldn't be surprised if I pretended to be a man to get what I want - similar to Queen Hatshepsut or even Cleopatra (who at one point, pretended to be a man to solidify power). 

But hobbit is probably most suiting. Among Adam's other "loving" names for me is "my little homunculus" - which means:

ho·mun·cu·lus/həˈməNGkyələs/

Noun:  

A very small human or humanoid creature.

A supposed microscopic but fully formed human being from which a fetus was formerly believed to develop.

Or "my little Hobbit", depending on his mood. I've fought him on both these definitions but sadly I regret that I may finally succumb to my doom. At least I would fall into the category of the four Hobbits who left the Shire as I am a restless type and don't like to stay put very long before I need another adventure. Causing a raucous in the village would also be my speciality and trouble would find me as it always does in real life except I imagine it would be more exciting in Middle Earth rather than the boring stupidity of Ottawa. Yes, I must say Hobbit fits.